Share Your Power With Student Mentors

A new freshman at our school once approached Aaron, one of my senior mentors. "Hey man, where can I buy some weed around here?" he asked. Aaron didn't lecture him or run to report him. He just looked the student in the eye and said, "We don't do that here." Not judgmental, not a big deal. Just matter of fact.

When Aaron told me the story later that day, I didn't punish the new student — or even let him know I knew about the conversation. Aaron had communicated what our school culture was like more effectively in five seconds than I could with a hundred announcements or assemblies. The student got the message.

Most principals think they need more security guards, more deans, or more rules to keep their schools in line. I discovered that the most untapped resource was sitting right in our classrooms — our students. Not just the obvious straight-A students teachers tend to love, but the ones who screwed up, figured it out, and found their way back.

I built a comprehensive mentoring program throughout my high school, creating a leadership pipeline from seniors all the way down to freshmen. These students — many who had walked through a mile of s**t and came out clean — became the backbone of our school culture. They were supporting their peers and investing in our school.

Here’s the difference between buy-in and investment: With buy-in, students accept a principal’s vision for school culture. With investment, students have a hand in creating school culture themselves.

Finding Hidden Leaders

Our mentoring program was unlike anything most schools had tried. Seniors became mentors to juniors, juniors mentored sophomores, and sophomores mentored freshmen. I divided our whole school into thirteen equal groups, with senior mentor teams responsible for their portion of the school population. Mentors worked in teams of 3, and each mentor had a mentor.

Students couldn't apply to be a mentor — they were auditioning from the day they entered my school. I watched how they handled setbacks, how they treated others, and whether they could figure things out when they screwed up. Some mentors were the students you might expect — but many were not. The ex-gangbanger, the skater, and the valedictorian all have value and can be tremendous resources if given the opportunity. They are all going through something.

We designed tee shirts for our incoming freshman and their mentors that said, "99'9%.” The biology teachers pointed out to me that, genetically speaking, we are all 99.9% alike. Differences are often created out of a need for them. I wanted to create a system that would bring all of our student subgroups together so they could see just how similar they really were.

Mentors weren't token representatives who sat in meetings. They were integrated into every aspect of school life. During back-to-school nights, they gave parents tours of the school. During crisis situations, they helped keep other students calm. When a new policy was being considered, they provided feedback before implementation. Mentors knew details security guards would never hear and proposed solutions administrators would never think of. Their insight was more valuable than any outside consultant because they lived in the reality of the school every day.

Most principals I met were skeptical about giving students this much influence. "What if they make serious mistakes?" they'd ask. My answer was always the same: then we fix it together. That's how they learn.

Training Student Mentors Like Teachers

Every Friday, I’d sit in a circle with my senior mentors and tackle real issues. These students were dealing with serious issues in their own lives — academic pressure, family problems, personal struggles — but they showed up ready to help others.

I gave them the exact same professional development I gave my teachers. They learned about multiple intelligences, trauma-informed approaches, effective questioning techniques, and the brain science behind student behavior. We workshopped real situations in these meetings. "I have this one mentee who won't talk to me," a mentor might say. Then the group would strategize approaches, practice what to say, and follow up the next week. The mentors themselves became a support network for each other.

I brought in every resource I could to prepare them. School psychologists taught them about mandated reporting requirements. Counselors showed them how to recognize graduation requirements and credit issues. Our deans taught them how to spot problems before they escalated. The mentors were also trained and served as peer mediators.

The most important lessons I taught them were about confidentiality and mandatory reporting. I emphasized that if someone says they want to hurt themselves, that's never a joke — it needs to be reported immediately. Because of this training, my mentors brought countless situations to my attention that might otherwise have gone unnoticed.

I always kept confidentiality at the forefront of our training. We sent letters home to parents explaining that mentors would have access to certain student data, and if they didn't want this shared, they could opt out. Not a single parent ever objected.

Our new senior mentors also attended a summer residency on a college campus and were equipped to go back to school the following fall and support their peers with college applications. Most of our students were going to be first generation college students — they needed all the help they could get. This is how you change systems.

Prioritizing Red List Students

My mentors focused on working with the red list students — the ones with the lowest GPAs, the worst attendance, and the most behavior problems. I used data to identify who needed help and then assigned mentors strategically.

One of my mentors, Jade, came to school drunk and threw up on the assistant principal's shoes when she was a freshman. By senior year, Jade had completely turned things around. She never forgot that I didn’t judge her by that worst moment. She figured it out, and that's what mattered. That's exactly why I picked mentors like Jade to work with red list students. I told my teachers, "I don't need you to be perfect. I need you to figure out how to be." That same philosophy guided my mentor selection.

When we got the five-week grade reports, I'd divide up the red list students among the mentor teams. If one team had way too many red list kids, I'd redistribute. I tried to pair students with mentors who could connect with them, though some mentors and their mentees were like oil and vinegar. When that happened, I say to the mentors: "You can't change this kid, so what can you change about yourself?"

The real power came when mentors advocated for their mentees. They'd attend IEP meetings if the parents approved. They'd sit in their mentees' classes when they were struggling. The mentees didn't have to figure everything out alone anymore — they had someone who'd been there before, someone who wasn't judging them for their mistakes but was helping them find a way forward.

I was brutally honest with my mentors about their responsibilities. "You need to be mindful of how you conduct yourself," I told them. "Your mentees are watching. One hundred students can show up tardy today — but we will notice if one of them is you.” These students had to understand that being a mentor meant being a role model, and that came with higher expectations. Mentors needed to be aware that their actions had an impact beyond themselves.

Creating a Leadership Legacy

At the end of each year, my mentor program culminated in a moving tradition. During award ceremonies, I'd give the senior mentors medals for their service. But even more meaningful were the recognition events where each senior mentor would bring one of their mentees to the auditorium.

Monica, who graduated in 2016 and became an executive director at a nonprofit, started crying during one of these ceremonies when honoring a mentee for "really getting his s**t together." She told him, "You weren't going to graduate. You weren't going to make it to 10th grade. And you did. I'm really proud of you."

For many of these students, this certificate was the only recognition they'd ever received. While my mentors often had plenty of medals and awards, this single acknowledgment meant the world to their mentees.

Elaina’s story captures why this approach worked. When I asked her to be a mentor, she questioned me: "Why me? I have a kid." “Who better to support young women,” I answered, “than someone who understands tough decisions?” Years later, when she came to enroll her own child in our school, she still remembered that moment when someone saw her not as a problem, but as a leader with valuable experience to share.

Working From Enlightened Self-Interest

Was running this mentoring program a lot of work? Absolutely. But it was enlightened self-interest at its finest — it was mutually beneficial. While other principals were begging for more security guards, counselors, and outside resources, I was tapping into the most valuable resource, which happened to be sitting in our classrooms. My mentors helped contain problems before they exploded. They gave me eyes and ears in places I could never be.

The return on investment was undeniable. Parents were blown away by the support their children received. Teachers saw the value and started integrating mentors into their own systems. Most importantly, students who might have been written off as "problems" became leaders who continued making a difference long after graduation.

I didn't need to hire more staff or bring in expensive consultants — I just needed to recognize that the solution was already there, waiting to be invited in. That's the difference between treating students as problems to be managed and seeing them as resources waiting to be tapped. When you share power with students, you don't lose it — you multiply it.

Build Your Own Mentorship Program

Ready to create your own mentorship pyramid that transforms school culture from the inside out? I offer workshops teaching administrators how to identify potential mentors who have "walked through fire and come out clean" — not just your obvious academic stars. I can guide you through the entire implementation process — from identifying your first cohort of mentors to building the recognition ceremonies that sustain the program.

No additional resources required — just a strategic approach to developing the student leaders already sitting in your classrooms. Contact me to get started.